Sunday, May 3, 2020

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I have thought of this topic often, have yet to truly figure out my purpose. I am always trying to find my purpose or the purpose of life. At birth our options are limited by the world, the people around us and there beliefs greatly influence what we do or even the things we achieve. I sometimes wonder if it is possible for anyone to have a genuine thought of there own. In my younger days everything i wanted to achieve revolved around materialism, ex cars cloths, electronics. I am now realizing that i must find a purpose higher than anything materialistic. 
There will always be a void regardless of how many thing i attain. I am ultimately driven by 2 main things compassion, family. Money is important to me but the idea of excess doesn't interest me as it used to. I believe being a fair/ compassionate human being, super seeds it all, doesn't mean i am not oblivious to the idea of money. My life mission is to live my life, treat everyone with compassion and the same respect, move along/ adapt as things come along. Im a simple man and i truly believe there is no real purpose to life we just create them as a society. one thing i do know is if i where to pass away today, god forbid. I feel content in the fact that i was caring and compassionate to every single person i have met or encountered, and i do mean everyone. 
 I want to be remember as someone who loved life, someone who loved everyone. I live a very selfless life. I would give the shirt off my back to a stranger. being this way does not always benefit me. I have tried to change or let others change my behavior, but i learned that its just in my hard wiring. I also face a strange delema, i am not particular interested in doing things in my life with the idea that others will remember me or appreciate me for those things. when i pass if am not remembered what matters to me are the things i do while i am alive. it would be selfish to  do things with the idea of being immortalized after death.

Monday, April 27, 2020


1.  Blog:
Part 1: Journal  
 Image result for future
The year is 2026. I have a wife and a son, we live somewhere in Canada. This morning feels exciting and new, I am totally happy and looking forward to what the day has to offer. I woke up early this morning for my run/ exercise routine. Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way it is now time to take a shower and get ready for work. I’m so excited to be back after my vacation. Had such a wonderful time in Norway with the wife and kid. Norway was so beautiful especially the country sides. I’ve missed work even though I’ve had such a wonderful time with my family. my job requires me to oversee 1000 employees and make sure that everything works perfectly. Making sure we have nurses, behavior specialist, residential specialist, program director, house manager that care about there job and the people we serve. my mission is to make sure we do everything in our power to make sure the people we serve live a happy fulfilling life. Somewhere that the family trusts and somewhere that the residents would love to call home.

the year is 2027 we are now in the middle of a pandemic matter of fact this virus shares a close resemblance to that of the coronavirus of 2019. People are becoming frantic and buying up everything. That’s not my biggest grief, but the stock market has taken a big hit. I have lost about half of my savings. I never thought that in my lifetime we would see or go through another pandemic. Things at the moment seem very uncertain due to the fact that not even scientist can tell use or help prepare us for the measures we need to take. The death toll is climbing daily.  I’m not sure what to make of this new pandemic I have gotten laid off work. Now me and my family are relying on government support to help us with daily living. It is now 2028 the stock market has not recovered and 50 percent of the population cant take care of there basic need due to the lack of jobs available/ resources.

I have won the lottery for 500 million dollars. I’m excited beyond belief. I can’t believe it, my mind is flooded with all the possibilities and things I can now do. The first thing I did was buy a huge chunk of land to build a family estate. Making sure my family is good and never in need for a place to live. I also find it important to knock everything off my bucket list, now that I am a millionaire. The first purchasing two of my favorite cars of all time. The fist being a mint BMW m3 and the second being a Lamborghini diablo. Having all these materialistic things are fun but they haven’t brought any fulfillment or happiness to my life. I would love to do something that benefits others and not just myself. I will use 20 million to make sure that the village my parents grew up in has constant light, and that the people living there never have to worry about electricity.  


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I am grateful for my job and the things i am able to learn on a daily basis not only form the clients we serve, but also for the staff i work with. there is never a day i wouldn't want to go to work. Even in the mist of  an epidemic like the corona virus, i am able to see joy and remain in relatively good spirit although things are not necessarily going my way or the way i would like for them to go. although i have had a tougher time dealing with stress lately, due to overthinking i am trying to look at this epidemic as a teaching moment. 
my program was hit hard with the outbreak of covid 19,with all the residents infected, and all staff except two infected. I worry about those of who i may have passed it along too. I am scared i may have given it to my parents. conversations with them keep me calm also lets me know that they are well. Although i am quarantined at work, serving/ helping someone other than my self seems to get rid of a lot of my anxiety/ depression.  I was given the option of taking time off, That definitely wasn't an option for me. I would have drove my self insane with worry. I am grateful that my job allowed the staff to quarantine with the residents, because other wise i would be in very bad mental state.
My job has done so much to make sure that everyone clients and staff included are comfortable. they continue to do so on a daily basis.  I am also grateful, that they understand that this news inst easy on anybody. The people at my job  go above and beyond with compensation/ needs that the staff request.  my employer is also on top of the things that we request for to better serve our clients. plenty of ppe equipment has been given. there are alot of measures in place to check everyone temperature and well being so that things never get too serious.
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These images represent the things i hope to attain in the future. they are placed in no particular order. the most important to me is family. threw good the good and the bad, i believe in fighting/support for those we love and hold dear. I believe i can also do more to show my family the love i truly have for them. Happiness is also up there with things i see in my future, knowing how depression can effect ones drive and ambition makes happiness something i hope i have plenty of in the future. my health is something i have steadily been trying to make improvements in over the past couple of years. I keep falling into bad habits thoe. I have faith that i will eventually develop better habits if i continue to work on them constantly. Consistency is something i am work on, i hope with age i continue to get better with staying consistent and getting the things i need done. My Medications seem to help me but i know i have the power/will within.